Posts tagged ‘mental-health’
Hey Divas,
When we think about the things we are loyal towards; like our jobs, our families, our relationships our friendships. It serves purpose, fulfillment in life, and an addition to our lifestyle.
Sometimes we are loyal to pleasing others, loyal to putting everyone and everything before ourselves. Loyal to the hustle. Loyal to the grind. Loyal to our grief our mistakes you know our coulda woulda shoulda’s. Loyal to the comfort, living in the mediocrity of our lives.
Where has it gotten us? Did we get what we wanted? If not, it does give us an opportunity to discover what we don’t like and to do something about it.
One of the best life lessons l’ve learned was from a therapist. Where do you expect to see yourself in 5 years? If we make no changes we will be where we are today. When we find ourselves at the fork in the road it’s a life shift that will go in the direction that we decide to take.
If life is not working right now then it’s time to make some decisions and take the direction on the path we would like to go.
If we make no changes life today will be the same in the next 5 years as it is for us today. Not making a decision is still a decision. It’s a decision that’s made for you. So why not take control of your life and make the decisions you actually want to make.
“ When you make a decision that is your truth. “
Tweet
I’ve made a decision to focus on what makes me smile and being loyal to that. Focusing on what makes me feel good and being loyal to that. Focusing on being curious and being loyal to that. Focusing on kindness to myself and others because you just never know what someone is going through and being loyal to that.
The greatest relationship we will ever have in this life is the one with ourselves everything and everyone else around us gets to experience our overflow. It makes everyone and everything around us better when we are at our personal best.

No one can steal our energy no one can steal our good juju vibes for themselves because it is ours. However we can give it away through people pleasing and giving in to others demands by not setting clear boundaries for ourselves.
If it doesn’t feel good likely a boundary is being crossed and your energy zapped! You will either feel inspired or drained after interacting with someone so be mindful of the company you keep dear diva.
Be loyal to your smiles.
Diva on a journey! This week’s goal 💪🏽💕 Daily To Do List
Circling back from last post I was successful in getting more activity in and managed to even lose 3 lbs.! I had a pretty active week running around and getting errands done. I actually shop at 3 different grocery stores so I got a lot of steps in going from one store to the next; since being on my wellness journey I’m real bougie about my produce and where I get it. Quality over quantity. I don’t care how great a sale is, if it’s trash I’m not buying it. I work too hard for my lifestyle and I care about what I put into my body.
This week’s goal is setting my up my days with intention and tackling my daily to do list. Call it the Virgo in me but I need structure in my life as I shared in a previous post it brings my life peace and balance so this week I will be focusing on what I need to do for this week and break it down into days. If you’re feeling stuck and trying to get it together yourself I challenge you to do the same dear diva!
Be Healthy Be Fabulous Be You!
Mia The Diva
Disclaimer: All information on this blog is provided for informational and educational purposes only, and is not to be construed as medical advice or instruction. No action should be taken solely on the contents of this WordPress flybyjuly.com blog. Please consult your physician or a qualified health professional on any matters regarding your health and weight loss or on any opinions expressed within this blog. You as the reader must be responsible for consulting with your own health professional on matters raised here. Flybyjuly.com will not accept responsibility for the actions or consequential results of any action taken by any reader.
Hey Divas,
So as I shared in a previous post I gained 20 lbs during the pandemic. I had also lost my father 2 years prior to the world shut down and people in my life were showing me who they are and their true colors.
It was alot to deal with not dealing. Grieving can be exhausting and emotionally draining if you do not have a proper plan in place. Grieve with purpose either to be better or to get better.
There is no magic timeframe of the grieving process it can last anywhere from several days to several months to several years to a lifetime.
Time eventually does heal but more importantly it’s what we do with this time because at one point or another we will lose someone or something significant in our lives.
How will you deal?
One thing I have learned so far in my life’s journey is to always have a PLAN because if you do not have one like the saying says; plan to fail.
Although my failures have been some of my greatest blessings in life. l did not realize it at the time.
I feel like my life could have been so much easier and would have saved myself a lot of unnecessary pain if I had an awareness and the right tools to deal with life and its’ charade of shenanigans.
The fact is that life is going to happen and much of it we have no control over as much as we like to think we do.
What we do have control over however is how we are showing up and how we respond to life ish because the hard days will come and they will also —- go.
If you find yourself in a crappy space of life right now, take heart that it is not forever it is just right now.
I know it sucks.
Have faith that you will make it through dear diva.
Going through grief and life events can be a roller coaster of emotions it can also be a source of triggers especially if we’ve gone through something traumatic and haven’t properly dealt with it.
Grief is painful it can drain what’s left of our life if we don’t get it in check. There is nothing more painful than wasting our precious time.
So many of us cope with food when things are “ off “ in life some of us drugs, alcohol, binge watching our shows etc. doing anything we can do to not feel the feels of the insurmountable pain we are in. – @flybyjuly
Tweet
Avoidance can show up in so many ways but for the purpose of this blog food is our drug of choice.
The tough thing about food vs. drugs, booze or binge watching TV shows etc. is that we need food to sustain our life.
So where do we draw the line? When have we crossed the line?
Food serves so many roles in our lives; nutrition, socializing, creativity, connection, holiday gatherings the list goes on and on.
So when does a diva put the breaks on the fridge, the buffet, the online food delivery to your doorstep, the sushi nights, and those Sunday Brunches with your girls?
Where do we draw the line between I need to eat this to sustain my life, I need to eat this for my social needs, I need to eat this because I want to have fun. I need to eat this because I’m sad, I’m angry, I’m anxious or depressed.
4 Questions to ASK yourself before your EAT your Emotions Away

The next time you’re about to eat something ask yourself these four simple questions:
- H – Hungry? Am I actually hungry? Cause a Diva can get her GRUB on right about now!
- A – Anger am I angry? I’m mad, fed up and sick of everyone’s sh*t. Where’s the chips.
- L – Lonely am I lonely? Am I depressed? Ice Cream makes everything ok.
- T – Time am I busy? Do I just need something quick to get in my stomach? I’m always on the run! Just need something quick before I pass out.
What I love about these questions is that it raises awareness and when we have awareness we can make better choices.
It’s not overnight, the chips and ice cream will win somedays and that’s ok we may actually need the ice cream and the chips in that moment but not every moment.
As time goes on and we become more conscious of what we are putting into out body we can understand what’s driving us and we discover other ways to deal with our pain.
What’s Your Vice?
I love seafood. Sushi is my vice, I know not terribly unhealthy but the “ All You Can Eat “ can be too hard to resist on a diva and caused me to over eat too much at times, it can also be expensive.
It takes time dear diva to discover the code that will crack your vice. I like a lot of people am an emotional eater it served many purposes for me during some pretty dark moments in my life.
Emotional eating isn’t always sitting in a dark room with a bucket of ice cream it can be snacking, going out to eat in excess, still eating when we’re not hungry or even when a diva is just bored.
When I was feeling especially isolated I would go out for sushi two to three times a week. I now go once a month as a treat and order half rolls because I honestly love sushi even when I’m truly happy it is one of my favorite things to do.
Over time I now picked up taking a drawing class again, something that is nostalgic that reminds me of my earlier days it gets me out of the house l’m able to express my creativity and it allows me to be social.
I use to go out and eat sushi to connect and catch up with my friends. I have great memories having sushi with my friends. The pandemic happened. Life changed and then I found myself in a space where I was alone and would go out by myself to feel better.
I would go out to eat just to get out of the house, see some people even if they were strangers so I did not have to be at home looking at my 4 walls anxious and depressed.
Not a good look for a diva! So I swapped my solo sushi dates for art class.
So take some time to reflect. What can you swap your VICE for? What’s a lost hobby you have? Is there a big project that you’ve been wanting to tackle?
Once you ask yourself these 4 simple H A L T questions before you grab that bag of chips or whatever your vice you will be able to eat a little bit more mindfully and hopefully have some clarity on what’s bugging you so that you can make some better choices on your journey to flyness!
Diva on a journey! 💪🏽💕 This week’s goal: Making time for movement during my day
So circling back from last post I did not quite make it getting up 1.5 hours early everyday it was too early for me to start working out but I do have the habit of getting up early, making my juice and smoothie for the day.
I realized what was stopping me was organization. It’s probably a Virgo thing but I crave stucture in all aspects of my life so why wouldn’t my wellness journey be any different. I did not hit my intended goal but I did learn more about my self and what is working and what’s not on this journey.
So going into this week with my new found knowledge, I’ll be gettin’ it in! My movements that is 😜 anywhere I can.
Be Healthy Be Fabulous Be You!
Mia The Diva
Disclamer: All information on this blog is provided for informational and educational purposes only, and is not to be construed as medical advice or instruction. No action should be taken solely on the contents of this WordPress flybyjuly.com blog. Please consult your physician or a qualified health professional on any matters regarding your health and weight loss or on any opinions expressed within this blog. You as the reader must be responsible for consulting with your own health professional on matters raised here. Flybyjuly.com will not accept responsibility for the actions or consequential results of any action taken by any reader.
Hey Divas,
I have a confession:
Self Care Sundays are a real thing for me!
It’s my only true day of rest. I love and live for my Sundays these days. So l get as much as l can get done during the week to enjoy some much deserved designated chill time on any given Sunday.

Not all of us have the time or the coins.
Self care can look like getting enough sleep, eating clean, getting outside and doing something you find fun that’s active. Drinking water. Yes simple things like drinking water is telling yourself daily I LOVE YOU and I want to keep you ALIVE!
Keeping on top of our mental health, such a big one it can creep up on a dime.
So take care of yourself dear diva.
All of these things together show us how much we care about ourselves, so always send that good juju and positive vibes your way on the daily!
What we do with intention is what gets our attention and depending about how we feel about ourselves is the action that we will take. @flybyjuly
Tweet
That can look like having the ‘ intention ‘ to get up early to work out to keep active & healthy we will give it our ‘attention’ set our alarms, meal prep and do all the things… but some how when that alarm goes off if you’re feeling crappy about life yourself etc. or you may get distracted by someone or something.
We either turn over or hit snooze if we are feeling anxious, depressed, or go off and do that other thing to distract ourselves, attend to whomever is needing our attention like kids, spouses, partners, pets and skip the work out.
We find ourselves in a rut and then shame ourselves for not working out or maybe we did not get enough sleep from being up all night being anxious or depressed the night before. Awareness is everything it gives us choices, that’s why it is so important to get our mental health together.
When we do things with intention there is an energy we place on it. The more love and compassion we give ourselves with non judgement shows self kindness, so sprinkle that Love onto yourself on the daily dear diva!
This is not a one size fits all approach we just have to find what works best for us that is in alignment with our lifestyle, desires and goals. However on the same note if we continue to do what we’ve always done we will continue to get what we’ve always gotten.
3 Ways How You Can Start Your Day With Intention
I know easier said then done but one day you will wake up and decide you don’t want to feel like this anymore or ever again and you’ll make a change just like that.
It’s a process and that’s why it’s called a journey. Taking just one extra step each day that’s in the direction of where you want to go will add up over time.
- Start Everyday with a MUST!
Like the saying goes where your attention goes energy flows so start your day with a MUST! List everything you MUST do for the next day the night before. This will set up your subconscious mind while you sleep and rest for the following day.
2. This week I will ______________everyday.
I challenge you to do one thing this week towards a better you let’s start with a goal. This week l will ____________ everyday.
3. Track Your Progress
Track your progress write a word or phrase on a sticky note and place it on your mirror about how you’re feeling or capture it in a notebook if you choose for privacy.
Diva on a journey 💪🏽💕 This Week’s Goal: Getting up 1.5 hours early everyday!
As for myself this week l will be getting up 1.5 hours early to workout everyday. ( Yikes ) but Ima do it. Let’s see how l do, l start an early day so l’m up for the challenge!
You can follow a diva on all the things @flybyjuly
Be Healthy Be Fabulous Be You!
Mia The Diva
Disclamer: All information on this blog is provided for informational and educational purposes only, and is not to be construed as medical advice or instruction. No action should be taken solely on the contents of this WordPress flybyjuly.com blog. Please consult your physician or a qualified health professional on any matters regarding your health and weight loss or on any opinions expressed within this blog. You as the reader must be responsible for consulting with your own health professional on matters raised here. Flybyjuly.com will not accept responsibility for the actions or consequential results of any action taken by any reader.
A Pandemic 2 years and 20 lbs later…3 Tips to get started losing that pandemic pooch!
July 1, 2022
Mia The Diva
Hey Divas,
Hello July!
We are officially full swing into summer, things are somewhat back to “ normal “ and we are outside.
Tweet

Between being at home during the pandemic having time to think and just having a full circle WTF moment. Here l am.
So I invite you as I go on this journey for the next 365 days towards a better self, eating smarter and getting this booodddy yadddy yaddy together!
This time around I am learning to work with my body and not against it, setting unrealistic goals & setting expectations that just were not realistic long term.
I had to take an honest look at myself to see what can be done so that I can look and feel at my personal best.
It’s been a journey over the years. I won’t blame it all on Ms. Rona, but along the way I’m learning what works and what doesn’t for me.
What I like and what I don’t like. I had to dig deep into where my negative feelings were coming from, my relationship with food, my relationship with myself, my body and other people.
I learned there were things I was holding onto that I needed to let go of. When we hold too tight onto things we are unable to grow.
I’ve learned how to embrace this space of life that I am in right now and all of its glorious mess.
I’m doing this for me, for my health, for my future self and to inspire others to pull it together themselves along the way.
3 Easy Tips to start losing those pandemic pounds & start gaining your life back!
- Do what you can with what you have, you don’t need a gym membership to do a quick 30 second plank that can build up over time to one minute, two etc. It cost nothing to take a quick brisk walk around the block.
- Track what your eating though an app or journal. There are so many apps out there to choose which one works best for you. I find writing it down and journaling works best for me because it allows me to process my thoughts and learn my triggers.
- Stay Motivated and hold yourself accountable. This can be done by setting some goals for yourself using the SMART formula. Make sure it is specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and keep a timer on it to give yourself a deadline to achieve that goal!
It can be too easy to focus too much on immediate gratification;
“‘Like l wanna lose 50 lbs. by Friday!”
Planning for the short, middle & long term can help us set different priorities for different stages of our journey.
Having realistic goals, setting milestones and steps needed to achieve each goal will hold ourselves accountable over the long haul.
Motivation is temporary to get that “ thing “ we want or desire but it’s all about those new habits dear diva that will carry us through! Small changes can add up and consistency is key.
You can Follow a diva on all the things @flybyjuly
Be Healthy Be Fabulous Be You.
Mia The Diva
Hey Divas,
Sometimes we are our own Biggest Critic;
If anyone ever talked to us the way that we talk to ourselves we would not be friends with them.
So why do we hold such value on the opinions of people who do little to nothing for us, even people we don’t even know?
Like the saying goes everyone has an opinion like everyone has a ________ fill in the blank.
It’s just an opinion and it can change like the weather.
Take heart dear diva and be kind to yourself, the world is hard enough on us.
We do not have to carry the weight of the world on our shoulders.
However many of us, WE are carrying the weight of our lives.
- The weight of all the pain.
- The weight of all the hurt.
- The weight of the forgotten dream.
- The weight of the heart-break.
- The weight of missed opportunity.
- The weight of grief.
- The weight of self hate.
- The weight of being late because it takes everything in you to get out of the bed.
- The weight of the diet that never actually starts on Monday.
- The weight of giving up before even getting started.
- The weight of never going swimming because your thighs jiggle and don’t like how you look in a bathing suit.
- The weight of laughing and pointing jokes at yourself to take the focus off you.
- The weight of saying that you are “ Good “ but feel like you’re dying from the inside out so you don’t have to do anything about it.
- The weight of making ourselves a joke of every conversation to ease our anxiety.
- The weight of success.
- The weight of failure.
- The weight of never enjoying the beach because of the stretch marks on your stomach and hips.
- The weight of never being yourself.
- The weight of trying to be the perfect daughter, sister, wife, partner, mother.
- The weight of not letting go.
- The weight of the pressure to look “ perfect “
- The weight of hiding yourself from the fear of being real.
- The weight of years of hating yourself through self-sabotage.
- The weight of knowing in your heart of hearts that you are imperfect but perfectly you.
- The weight of knowing you deserve better.
- The weight of knowing your are enough and always have been.
- The weight of surrounding yourself with people who have limited beliefs.
- The weight of not being free.
- The weight of not holding ourselves accountable.
The good news is we can turn this around; it’s never too late to become your very own Biggest Fan!

Get quiet with yourself, by visualizing your best future self try a daily check in with that Diva and ask her what you can do today to get an inch closer to whom you want to become.
Be Healthy Be Fabulous Be You!
Mia The Diva